Fear Of Failure & Perfectionism
This video is for you if you are a perfectionist who would love to transition into a different career, or start your own business.
Transcript:
This video is for you if you are a perfectionist who would love to transition into a different career, or start your own business. However, right now you’re stuck.
You’re stuck in that job you hate, stuck in that career you’ve outgrown, or stuck in your process with getting that new business off the ground.
There’s a very good reason why you are stuck if you’re a perfectionist.
I can literally tell you right up front that perfectionism is for sure a delay mechanism for you.
And it could also, as you’ll discover later on in this video, if you don’t make a different choice, be the very behaviour that stands between you and your dreams coming true.
So, it’s incredibly important to talk about perfectionism.
Personally I have a lot of experience with perfectionism.
I used to be a perfectionist. But over the last 13 years I’ve also been a professional career transition advisor, and the majority of the clients that I’ve helped change careers, or start their own business, and a lot of the people I advise on a daily basis who come to me, smart people in their 30s and 40s, they’re perfectionists too.
What do all perfectionists have in common?
They have in common that they’re incredibly afraid of failure – Fear of failure.
And what do you do when you’re afraid of failure?
You do everything possible to avoid failure.
You do not engage in things that could bring failure, I.e. that’s really what perfectionism is all about.
It’s about doing everything possible to avoid failure.
Why is that a problem when you want to change career, or start your own business?
It is a problem because if you want to change careers, or start your own business, you are going to have to do things that will feel uncomfortable and really imperfect, and that might result in what you perceive as failure.
So, if you’re stuck right now and you’re a perfectionist, that is why.
Let’s talk about how you can deal with it.
First of all, I want you to know that I get you.
I used to be a total perfectionist too, especially back when I was stuck in a corporate job.
But back then I decided that it was more important for me to create a career or business that I truly loved, that made me feel fully alive, and that fully engaged me.
That was more important to me than it was to be perfect.
I therefore realised that I needed to stop doing everything possible to avoid failure if I wanted to create that.
So, I had a choice,
I could either stay a perfectionistic overthinking person, really stuck, or I could decide to become a brave doer who took imperfect action.
And I can tell you, I am so glad I made that second choice to become a brave doer, because ever since then, this was back in 2005, I’ve had a consultancy where I help people just like you change careers and start their own business. And I bloody love it.
Because I chose to stop being a perfectionist and start doing things that felt really scary, and that might result in failure.
You need to make that very same decision if you want to move on.
One of the things I’ve noticed over the last 13 years helping career changers and new entrepreneurs is that the ones who don’t make their dreams come true, they generally always tend to be perfectionists.
Because here’s the deal, perfectionists rarely make their dreams come true…
…because it’s never the right time…
… the idea they have for the business is not perfect enough…
…their product is not perfect enough…
…They’re not qualified enough…
…or … you get it.
What’s YOUR excuse right now?
What’s your biggest perfectionistic excuse right now why you can’t change careers, why you can’t start your own business?
What’s that worry?
What is it you’re trying to protect yourself from?
You need to decide what is most important for you.
Is it most important to be perfect?
Or is it more important for you to make your dreams come true?
Do you want to be perfect or do you want to make your dreams come true?
You need to consciously make that decision.
Because here’s what I really want you to think about, that fear of failure that you’ve got, failure is never final.
Failure is NEVER final
You might have to do things that are uncomfortable, and you feel like oh my God I’m about to fail. But you’re not going to die. Failure is never final.
I will tell you what you should worry lot more about:
Staying stuck in that job or career you hate.
That will give you health issues, mental, physical. It might result in divorce, loss of friendship.
And most importantly, it will result in you never really knowing what you’re truly capable of.
My friend, I know how hard it is when you’re a perfectionist, but it’s a choice that you can make to change.
The way to change away from perfectionism is to decide what matters most to you.
And if what matters most to you is to create or find a business, a career you truly love that makes you fully come alive, you need to stop doing everything possible to avoid failure.
Perfectionists end up at the end of their lives being very regretful, because they never experience what they’re truly capable of.
Whereas people who decide, “Okay, I know I have perfectionist tendencies, but I’m going to act bravely and take imperfect actions,” they are the ones who make their dreams come true.
And I would love for you to join me to be one of those
Often what I notice with people who are perfectionists it’s because they have real issues around self confidence and imposter syndrome.
Want to continue this conversation?
Come on over to rikke.me/confidence
and you’ll get my best videos on imposter syndrome and confidence, and how to make your dreams come true.
I’ll see you over there.